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Did you know that you and your partner can learn to recover from the aftermath of an affair in just a few counselling sessions, even if every discussion you have had about the affair so far has ended up in a heated argument, the trust levels in your relationship are at zero, or if you want to move on from the affair, but just don’t know how?
I know this sounds crazy because we’re so used to hearing that you need months or years of counselling to help a relationship to change, but the reality is far from this.
In fact, on this page I’m going to share three secrets with you that form the backbone of how I help couples recover from the aftermath of an affair.
But first....
Who Am I?
My name is Alastair Duhs and I am a relationship expert based in Sunnynook, Auckland.
Over the last 30 years I have helped thousands of couples communicate better with other and develop more loving, passionate and connected relationships, often in just 2-3 counselling sessions.
30
Years In Private Practice
15,000
Over 15,000 Clients Seen
Recover from the aftermath of an affair in just a few counselling sessions.
So, what are the three secrets to recovering from an affair?
1
The first secret is...
To recover from the aftermath of an affair, you and your partner must understand why the affair happened.
In most cases, there are many reasons why affairs happen. Some of these reasons are to do with the individual who has had the affair. However there may be other reasons why the affair happened, such as how your relationship was prior to the affair.
The truth is that couples need to look at both sets of reasons to truly understand why the affair happened. Without this understanding other affairs are likely to happen in the future.
2
The Second secret is...
The partner who has had the affair must truly understand the hurt that the affair has caused their partner.
Too many couples try to move on from the affair before this hurt is truly heard, understood and acknowledged. Unless this is done, almost all couples struggle to move on from the effects of the affair.
In relationship counselling I can help couples deal with the hurt that the affair has caused, without either person feeling unfairly attacked, judged or blamed.
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The Third secret is...
There are some simple communication tools that improve the ways couples talk together about the affair.
It is no-ones fault that most couples have never been taught these simple communication tools. However, as a result of not knowing what these tools are, many couples get stuck in an endless cycle of questions, accusations, blame and denial, often ending up in anger, arguments or distance between them.
In just a few counselling sessions I can teach you the communication skills that you need to know to free yourselves from the aftermath of an affair.
And once you know these skills, you and your partner will usually never go back to the arguments, the distance or the lack of understanding that plague so many relationships after an affair occurs.
What Others Say:
Over the years, I believe that I have seen a total of 7-8 counsellors. Without any shred of exaggeration, my experience with Alastair was by far the best. He was extremely helpful and he really truly did change my situation at the time completely into a positive direction. I will never forget what he did for me, and all I need to do is think about him and it renews my faith in people and that they can care and make a difference and things can change.
Sonya
Past Client
Alastair, your counselling skills are exceptional and I never felt judged by you. You made me feel comfortable and safe to open up about my feelings. You were able to help me identify what was really causing issues in our relationship and gave us practical tools to work through them. Thank you for helping my partner and I communicate better and ultimately save our relationship."
MIKE
Past Client
Alastair has an amazing ability to make you feel comfortable, safe and cared for. I have learnt so much from him about communication and how to navigate through tough times in my relationship. My partner and I now have a stronger and more loving relationship thanks to Alastair's guidance.
KAREN
Past Client